Weekend Writing Warriors 4/7/13 #8sunday

Today’s 8 are from a new story I’m working on for part of a collection of shorts I want to put out at Christmas (assuming I finish all the stories by then).  All the stories are connected; two of them, “Bardo Bureaucracy” and “The Kindness of Strangers,” have already been published. And while it won’t be part of the collection, my Amazon short “Tim and Sara” is related to all these stories as well.

In today’s story, MC Mia keeps hearing people telling her she’s going to die. She meets Chris, who’s been hearing the same thing about himself, and they fall in love as they spend more and more time together trying to figure out what’s going on.  They learn that they’ll die when the sun dips below the horizon on a certain day, but Mia still doesn’t know why this is happening, only that it’s part of some higher power’s plan.

As just a sliver is left above the water, Chris turns to me and says, “Fuck it all. I won’t let Them take you without a fight.”

“What about you?” This isn’t part of the plan; what if it makes Them angry? Selfishly, what if They decide to make it hurt?

“Don’t worry about me.” He mutters something under his breath in a language I don’t understand, then kisses me hard.

“Chris,” I cry out through his kiss, and then the sun is set and the world goes dark.

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  1. Wait a minute-just wait a darn minute. HELP save these kids. Scary eight.

    1. This snippet is only halfway through the story. And the whole book will be about people saving each other and themselves. It’ll be okay. :)

  2. I can feel the urgency here. Powerful snippet.

  3. Great selection of sentences! I love how you get inside your characters’ heads. I’ll be interested in your collection too.

  4. Wow, what a premise! I’m on the edge of my seat here, terrific snippet!

  5. What an interesting set-up! Such tension—I’m hooked!

  6. Wow. Talk about a scary situation. I hope these kids can somehow get away from whatever is supposed to be happening to them

  7. oooooh nicely done and definitely wanna find out what comes next – good job (and hope the kids make it)

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