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Weekend Writing Warrior 5/22/16 #8Sunday

coverFor May I’m pulling from my short story collection, The Futility of Loving a Soldier.

It’s eleven stories about veterans and their relationships with family and friends.

Today’s excerpt comes from the second of five related stories, “A Family Tradition.” This one is about Maarten, a man who served during WWII and has spent his life battling his father’s legacy, as conveyed by his single mother, Ophélie.

In this excerpt, continuing from last week’s, he’s just arrived home from a Scouting trip with his sons, to find a strange car in the driveway. They go inside to find out who the visitor is.

* * * * * * *

“These are the boys,” Maarten heard his wife say, “John, Ted, and Arthur.”

“They’re wonderful,” said a male voice that tickled at the edge of Maarten’s memories.

He followed his sons into the living room but froze on the threshold.

A man roughly his height stood as he entered, hands twisting the army hat he held. He had the same nose and dark hair as Maarten, and the same way of standing and of cocking his head slightly to look at someone when sizing them up.

“Hello, Maarten,” said the man.

Catherine, sitting on the sofa, turned towards her husband, her eyes apologetic as she said, “Dear, this is—”

“I know who this is.” Maarten took a small step forward, willing his voice and heart to calm.

* * * * * * *

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8 Comments

  1. Oh, it’s his father, isn’t it? I can feel the tension in the room from this powerful snippet. Well done!

  2. Hm, definitely sounds like they’re related. Interesting reunion!

  3. Obviously they haven’t seen each other for a long time, since she felt the need to introduce him.

    1. It’s been at least 30 years since they’ve seen each other.

  4. Great hook. Like the others, I’m thinking it’s his father. Good snippet. :-)

  5. Intense reunion! Great hook! :D

  6. Wonderful flow, great dialogue, and powerful hook!

  7. You can’t leave me guessing who this is???

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